A Few Bad Apples

I am a huge fan of coach John Wooden. I am currently reading my second book written by him Wooden: A Lifetime of Observations and Reflections on and Off the Court . His messages are very inspiring to me.

In one section he discusses the topic of bad apples. Basically it follows the idea that in any profession or group there is a tiny percentage of bad apples. The percentage never really changes but they are always there. The percentage of good apples is always large. We just never hear about them.

Of course politicians come to mind in a hurry. But this also got me thinking about the single mom and single dad discussions.

I believe the overwhelming majority in these groups are good. But the ones that get most of the attention are the bad apples. This is especially true in the online discussions.

Over the years, the small percentage of bad apples in the single dad category smothered the voices of the great ones. The door is beginning to crack open a bit to let these stories out, but we still have a long way to go.

We would all be a lot better off if we followed some additional advice by John Wooden. ‘”Be quick to praise, and slow to criticize.”

What do you think? Have a few bad apples made it tougher on the good ones? Can you think of other groups this applies?

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  1. #1 by Theresa on November 18, 2010 - 2:32 pm

    I often think about the good apples and the bad apples. My gripe is not about single moms and or single dads being good or bad apples. Talk shows, and I use that term losley, are always about Bad apple singel parets, moms and or Dads, or bad step parents? I guess I am a lucky person. Being a divorced mother of two, I met a man 17years ago that changed my life and my out look on the stigma Single parents or step parents. I married that man, who took me, my children, all the baggage that come with that and made us a FAMILY. My husband,never had biologocal children of his own, and from the outside looking in, and the inside looking out has always and will always be “Dad”. Don’t get me wrong, it has not always been perfect, but what family is perfect. What we had and have is a mutual respect for each other and the FAMILY. I can never repay this man for being my best friend, husband and father to our family. Our children respect and love him and you would never know that he is not their biological father, he is just Dad. We have overcome many obstacle that life has thrown our way, but who hasn’t. I know we will, as a FAMILY be growing old together, with a mutual respect for each other. And I thank him for all he has done and taught me for the past 17 some odd years. In my eyes, he is a “Good Apple”.

  2. #2 by Barry on November 18, 2010 - 3:20 pm

    Awesome Theresa. Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing. Sounds like you certainly picked a good apple. My guess is he feels the same way :).

  3. #3 by BigLittleWolf on December 12, 2010 - 6:59 pm

    What I fear is that there are in fact more bad apples than we realize. And there’s nothing we can do about it. Righting the situation isn’t possible. The only thing that is possible is getting through, as best we can.

    What I do resent tremendously is the way the media rewards the bad apple stories and even fans the fires of controversy. I also know just how easy it is to take any data and interpret it to serve your purpose, so I tend to disbelieve “statistics” – regardless of which way their particular wind is blowing, or even the topic at hand.

    I, for one, would happily read and watch more “good news” stories, especially when it comes to families.

    • #4 by Barry on December 13, 2010 - 2:05 pm

      D,

      I am not so sure the balance is tipped towards more bad apples. I think your point about the media emphasis on the bad ones is right on target. Same reason we have these idiots exploiting their kids on reality tv shows. Shock sells.

      I will once again quote John Wooden (can you tell I like this guy), “You do the right thing, because it is the right thing to do”. Seems like you get his idea as well 🙂 Holiday Heartache: Shopping for the Ex

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