Archive for November, 2010

A Few Bad Apples

I am a huge fan of coach John Wooden. I am currently reading my second book written by him Wooden: A Lifetime of Observations and Reflections on and Off the Court . His messages are very inspiring to me.

In one section he discusses the topic of bad apples. Basically it follows the idea that in any profession or group there is a tiny percentage of bad apples. The percentage never really changes but they are always there. The percentage of good apples is always large. We just never hear about them.

Of course politicians come to mind in a hurry. But this also got me thinking about the single mom and single dad discussions.

I believe the overwhelming majority in these groups are good. But the ones that get most of the attention are the bad apples. This is especially true in the online discussions.

Over the years, the small percentage of bad apples in the single dad category smothered the voices of the great ones. The door is beginning to crack open a bit to let these stories out, but we still have a long way to go.

We would all be a lot better off if we followed some additional advice by John Wooden. ‘”Be quick to praise, and slow to criticize.”

What do you think? Have a few bad apples made it tougher on the good ones? Can you think of other groups this applies?


Is My Page Turning?

Recently, I was forwarded a terrific article by a friendĀ  Peter Ehrlich. The article is called The Disease Called Perfection, originally posted by Dan on his blog Single Dad Laughing.

If you read the article you should agree it is a great thought provoking piece. As I continued to review the website I found great posts on a variety of topics. I recommend you visit this terrific site often. It will be worth it.

However, I have begun to feel a disconnect towards articles I find on single dad websites about potty training, kids homework, ex issues, dating hotties, etc.

I remarried two years ago which was a major change. But I still connect with being a single dad. I will always feel the need to stand firm with single dads getting the respect they deserve.

This fall my youngest daughter went off to college. I now seem a bit lost.

After 10 years of being a full time single dad of three, they are all gone. Sure, they will come home for breaks and holidays, but that is just to visit now.

So though it may seem I am depressed, I am not. At times I do drift off and picture them in their younger years. But it is not as much of an empty nest issue as a ” Who am I really?”

I read a quote recently that stated, ” Life is easy and fun when you start being who you really are instead of what others think you should be.”

Who do I want to be? That is the question I need to explore.

Have you ever had this dialog with yourself? Do you ever question your true purpose?

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